The Tuesday morning Men’s Bible Study is about to wrap up our reading of Joan Chittister’s, The Rule of St. Benedict: A Spirituality for the 21st Century. We began reading the book of daily reflections in January and will finish in less than two weeks. Along the way there have been many insights, some of which came fromunexpected places. Benedict’s Rule has some mundane chapters, including things as stimulating as when to read particular psalms in the worship cycle. Sister Chittister enables the reader to pull out something valuable from every chapter, however, which is quite spectacular.
For example, in the readings for this past week there were a couple of chapters on what an abbot should do when a family wants to dedicate their child to the monastery for service to the church. Clearly that has no parallel to modern life, right? On the surface, yes - however, Sister Joan went someplace that I found immensely insightful. As she remarked on the thinking behind the rule - the “why” that undergirds this particular part of the rule - she explained that the process for accepting children into the order under the right conditions was so that their development and commitment to the community would be strong and appropriate and not end up half-hearted, distracted, or resentful.
Her example is the marriage relationship that starts out with great intentions and much excitement, yet ends up being a union of two people living separate lives, sometimes living in different parts of the same house. Such relationships are stale and become somewhat mechanical. Devoid of intention and passion, the marriage becomes something much less than it was intended by God to be. Benedict was keen that the men and women who were called into the order (or whose parents decided they were called) not find themselves in the monastic family years later simply going through the motions.
The example certainly applies to a number of points in our life, besides the analogy to a stale marriage. I immediately connected it to our relationship with God. Although many of us have a mountain top experience (or a series of them) that anchors our faith for the rest of our lifetime, the initial excitement of becoming an intentional follower of Jesus Christ can also become stale over time. We may go through the motions and the mechanics of it, attending church, even saying halfhearted prayers, but not really flourishing in the relationship. Underneath it’s as though we live a separate life from God; God has God’s place and we have ours, and occasionally we visit one another.
I heard something this past week that resonated with this line of thinking. It was a reflection on the reality that the average Christian in the average Christian community comes together once a week to be inspired and energized in word and sacrament and then goes away for six days to his or hernormal life, only to return again at the end of theweek. The insight was that few of us are really actively living out our faith – living out the teachings of Jesus on a daily basis. Jesus’ commands to seek justice and peace, to feed the hungry, clothe the naked, care for the sick, and all the rest of it are not optional components in the lives of disciples. They are central. This person was wondering what it would look like if, having been fed in word and sacrament, Christians would actively pursue Jesus’ teachings each and every day.
When I counsel couples before they are married, we always talk about the care their relationship requires to stay healthy. Time spent together, conversation, intimacy, openness – all of the things that make the relationship work don’t just happen. No matter how in love we are when we say “I do”(we actually say “I will” in the marriage ceremony!), we have to foster and nurture the relationship to keep it healthy. We tend to think it should come naturally and easily, but most of us learn over time that our assumption isn’t the reality.
So what is one to do when we begin to realize that our faith might have become half-hearted, distracted, or even resentful? In short, we get to work. We put in the time with God, even in the initial awkward silence that can greet us when we sit down to pray and have no words. But in time, the words will undoubtedly come, even if the words are along the lines of, “I don’t know what to pray, and I’m not sure you’re hearing me anyway.” Perhaps a retreat is in order, a couple’s retreat of sorts for God and us. We can steal awayfor a day or a weekend to a monastery or a retreat center and just see what we can discover about our faith journey. Coming to church with others who are also working at living our faith to the best of our ability is central to the process, too.
Some of us have chosen to become followers of Jesus as adults, fully aware of our decision. Others of us were “given to God” as infants at our baptism and may or may not have picked up the deep commitment to the baptismal identity that is ours, nonetheless. All of us, no matter the origins of our faith, are in need of careful attention to our faith and our relationship to our creator and our savior. We tend to think it should be easy, and beat ourselves up when it’s not, but in the end, we realize the most valuable connections we have are the ones we work to nourish and grow.
Tom+
Generous God, I give thanks to you for the gifts that you have given me; All that I have comes from you. Help me to remember this and rejoice in your goodness.Walk with me my God. Help me on my spiritual journey, so that I may constantly renew my relationship with you and all the important people in my life. Renew in me your Spirit. Give me the strength and courage to be a better follower of Jesus, to be a better disciple. Help me to hear and respond to the call to "Come, follow Me" every day.Grant this for the sake of your only Son Jesus Christ, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.