The Honorable Brett Kavanaugh. Dr. Christine Blasey Ford. These two individuals have become the poster children of the brokenness of our political system. Both have been called victims in recent weeks, and both have been accused of lying. Both have been said to have been credible, and both have also been described in terms of how this confirmation process has potentially ruined their lives. What we call them, how we refer to them, and how we interpret the events of the last two weeks is often determined by what political tribe we belong to. Each side clearly sees what’s going on, who’s manipulating, grandstanding, and trying to use the process for their own gain. Each side assumes that everyone on the other side is ignoring the real facts for their own benefit. Truth and justice are so relative these days that it’s unclear what we’re left fighting for, except the one thing we’ve always fought for: power.
Winning elections is more about holding onto power than addressing the common good these days. Perhaps that’s always been the case, but it’s more obvious and damaging now than at any time in decades. We are short-sighted in so many ways, including in the political arena. We’ve chosen to tinker under the hood of our democratic republic so that we could get the results we wanted, often at the expense of how things would play out over the long term. Gerrymandering, for example, is largely to blame for the reality that our elected leaders don’t work together to solve problems in bi-partisan ways like they did once upon a time. There’s a reason that Senators and Representatives with the most leverage are those who have either announced their retirement or come from districts that are swing districts.
The truth is that there are many elected leaders in gerrymandered safe districts, meaning they are more at threat of losing in a primary race than a general election. That makes them less likely to want to reach across the aisle. Your same-party opponent will paint you as weak and as a traitor to the cause if you work too closely with the enemy. And yes, we are now enemies across the aisle. We know that the party in power when census-based redistricting occurs is usually favored by the new lines when they are drawn. Some cases are egregiously out of whack, while others are subtler, yet just as effective. This feeds into the hyper-partisan nature of our politics and feeds the polarization that also makes it hard to find compromise. Politicians often play to the fears of their base and set up a never-ending series of straw men they can knock down.
We also find ourselves in an ever-deeper hole of hypocrisy as well. We have political amnesia about the times our party behaved badly, which allows us to call out the other side when they do the same thing. On some level, however, we do remember all the misdeeds, eroding trust in the persons who shout down from their high horses, particularly when the horse is standing on the other side of the aisle. We decry things like outside campaign money, especially when it’s benefiting the other party! We blast dirty campaign ads and distortions aimed at our candidate, while posting the equivalent on our social media to discredit the candidates we don’t like. Which is why no one trusts one another in this most recent Supreme Court nomination battle. It seems no one is working from pure intentions; appeals and arguments are more for cameras than genuine efforts to lead, heal, and move forward.
Am I cynical? You bet I am. Although I have my own leanings, I do my best to minister to everyone in my care. I get to have thoughtful conversations with liberals and conservatives. I get to hear people’s valid concerns and hopes. I get to see people who experience new insights and achieve greater understanding of an issue. I also get to see when people set aside their beliefs and their convictions because power is on the line and we want to see our tribe hold on to or do what it takes to obtain that power. That’s the hard part. Knowing how wonderful people are, and yet getting a front row seat to a seemingly willful disregard for objectivity. It goes both ways, for the record.
So, what am I most concerned for in this latest debacle? Mainly that we’re politicizing another real issue, when it comes to sexual abuse, and how to handle the stories women are beginning to share more openly. This era, given our polarization, leaves little room for an outcome except that we’ll see women’s accusations accused of being political ploys or power plays that innocent men will fall prey to (a new fear to stoke). This is not a time to fall on the fear of false accusations, for that diminishes the validity of the vast majority of claims, which are not false. The same thing has happened with race over the years. There are those who still insist racism is merely a political talking point, and not a real issue, meaning it’s hard to address real and consistent problems.
I don’t know the truth in the Christine Blasey Ford/Brett Kavanaugh testimonies from last week. I have drawn my own conclusions, of course, like most people. I have listened to my gut and my heart, and applied my knowledge of human behavior, and no doubt filtered it through my own tribal lenses in the process. I am aware of the latter reality and can freely admit it, while I test my conclusions and hunches as objectively as I can.
What I do know, and what I alluded to on Sunday, when offering a special prayer for victims of sexual exploitation, abuse, and harassment, is that Dr. Blasey Ford’s willingness to share her story, whether we believe her or not, invited a lot of women to share stories they have been keeping silent about. The calls to abuse hotlines have increased dramatically. Clergy and counselors have had their phones ring and received emails in their inboxes about such things. What we cannot do is let political gamesmanship make too much or too little of these realities. Regardless of our political bent, we must listen and respond appropriately. We must not ridicule and shame women into silence, when so many have been silent for so long. The power of the recent #MeToo movement was and is that it was a way for women to share with each other the empowering knowledge that they were not alone. It also showed the rest of us, those of us with eyes to see, just how serious this problem has been, as it lurked for far too long in the shadows of our history.
The irony of the situation is that it is our power struggle in Washington that has highlighted the power struggle in so many relationships, a struggle that men have typically dominated. That doesn’t make us all misogynists, rapists, or abusers, but it doesn’t mean it’s not a real struggle either. Our response must be one of compassion, and when appropriate, confession. As we learn new things and new perspectives, we must hear them as they are offered with as little filtering as possible so that we can help create a newer, safer, fairer future for everyone. That’s a tall order now that #MeToo has found its way into the halls of the Senate, but it’s not impossible.
Like everyone else, I’m interested to see what happens in the coming days in Washington. I can admit how much of a mess the whole situation has become for all involved, and how no outcome will be good for all of us, as a nation. Whatever happens, a large portion of this nation will be angry, will have a greater mistrust of the “other” in politics, and will demonize the side that “wins”. Some of it may be valid, and some of it will no doubt be more tribalism. Now, more than ever, both Dr. Blasey Ford and Judge Kavanaugh need our prayers – along with their families. Now, more than ever, our elected leaders need our prayers for wisdom, discernment, courage, and honesty. Now, more than ever, we need to be honest with ourselves and our God about our own blindness, deafness, the things we do, and the things we are leaving undone. It’s the only way forward.
Tom+
Below is the prayer I read on Sunday. I adapted it from the website of Mary DeMuth for use in this context and in worship: https://www.marydemuth.com/a-prayer-for-sexual-abuse-victims/.
Lord God,
We lift up those who have been abused and exploited. We pray You would usher them toward healing in all things.
Be so near them in their storytelling process. Help them to know that an untold story never heals, that burying the pain only hurts them and others. Please bring the right people into their lives who also long to see them set free. Please give them fortitude and bravery to share with those safe people.
Give them a holy longing to be set free from the past and courage to seek healing. While it is true that this abuse once marked and marred them, it is truer still that You will take this devastation and make a resilient, beautiful life from the ashes of their pain. Instead of being marked, show them that they are spotless, unmarked, whole.
While evil wanted to destroy and de-story them, it will not succeed. Silence those demeaning thoughts that tear at their value. Bring deep grace if they blame themselves for the abuse and assault. Help them internalize that what happened wasn’t asked for, wasn’t wanted. Set them free from feeling dirty.
Help them to forgive the people who sexually abused them. Not to let them off the hook at all, but so they can be set free from being tied to them through anger and bitterness. Give them the gumption needed to make a choice today that the perpetrator’s heinous act no longer needs to define them.
May they become a conduit of change for other sexual abuse victims. May they boldly share their story in the light, so others can identify and find hope.
Wash away any shame that they still feel. Help family members and friends embrace them instead of judging them. Bring them into a healing community of authenticity.
Bring laughter back into their life. Bring joy. Bring hope. Bring peace. Bring life. Bless their family in abundant ways. Come near.
Amen.